I have met with the oncologist, the general surgeon, the infertility doctor, the dentist and the plastic surgeon this past week and it's been nothing short of a circus! Monday, I met with the oncologist who filled me in on more information that I had no clue about! He just sat and chatted with us for quite a while, which was nice! He basically told me that I would be getting two different types of chemo. The first would pretty much start three weeks or so after my initial surgery. This chemo is the one that will make me lose my hair. He said he didn't want to go into details with me about that because he needed to wait until after my initial surgery to see exactly what type of chemo I would be getting. From my understanding, this chemo will basically happen every three weeks and I think it will last approx 4 hours each visit. Not too sure about that yet. The second type of chemo I will get will also start three weeks or so after my surgery. This chemo I will take every three weeks for 45 minutes for one full year. This is the chemo that strictly fights the HER 2 I was talking about in my earlier post. The good thing about this chemo is that I will not have any side effects from it, no puking, no hair loss, no loss of apetite, etc. :) After I am completely finished with the chemo, after my full year, I will then take a hormone therapy for an additional five years! OMG FIVE YEARS!!! lol Looks like my oncologist and I are going to be bff's until I'm 40! I will get a port put in my chest area while I'm in my first surgery so that I can get chemo for the next year. I had never seen one of those before, but the surgeon showed mom and I what it looks like. If I had to describe it, I would say it looks like the red easy button off of the office max commercials, except it's no bigger around than a nickel. It's made of a metal type substance on the bottom and the top is like a rubber mush that's soft. It has a thin tube running off of it that will connect through a vein and somewhere down towards my heart. The rubber on the top is just where they will stick me to recieve the chemo. The purpose of the port is so I don't have to keep getting stuck in the arm or the hand to get my chemo. Apparently it's not painful, which is AWESOME!!! :) So, I face to face asked the oncologist if I would lose my hair... like FOR SURE lose my hair. lol I think I just needed to hear those words come out of HIS mouth. Sure enough, he said, "Dana, you're going to lose your hair." I was fine with it, but I just needed to hear him say it. I had been putting off cutting my hair until I heard it from him. Speaking of the hair cutting thing, later on Monday night, mom and I got in the car and she asked if I was ready to cut my hair. I said, well, I guess now is as good a time as any! So, we went to get my hair did! I actually didn't have a hard time cutting it off at all!! (I was extremely surprised by this, btw!!) I got it colored and cut and I actually really like it!! It's sooooo easy and simple to fix! Poor mom, she tried really hard to do well with the whole hair cut thing, but every time I looked over at her, those eyes were really big and she tried to force a smile! Sister was there taking lots and lots of pictures... don't tell her, but I caught big tears in her eyes at one point... She kept assuring me that it was a super cute cut and that I looked ok. I looked in the mirror after the girl was finished and I'm certain I made a horrible face because OMG my hair was HUGE!!! I had to tame it down after I walked out because I felt like I was one of those white haired church ladies that looks like they have a helmet on!!! Definitely not attractive for 32! After I tamed the beast, I liked it much, much better!!
Monday afternoon I met with the infertility doctor, aka egg doctor, to see about freezing some eggies!!! I was quite nervous going in to see that doctor! I wasn't quite sure what to expect or if this was even a possibility for me, but I was just praying the whole afternoon that it would just work!! I know I had posted earlier about not being able to freeze eggs, but the situation with the surgery has changed and now I'm going to get that opportunity!!! YAY ME!!!!! :) So, I tell him my situation and he responds with, "Let's do this!! I can definitely get you some eggs!!" Well alright then!!! The details of this retrieval are crazy, but I gotta do what I gotta do to get some babies!! I have to basically wait until my lady cycle starts, then I start taking shots on a daily basis. (and yes, I mix the drugs myself and I give myself the shots!! Watch out!!) It's pretty much going to be a shot a night in my tummy, so that won't be so bad!! I will go into the office every other day to get lab work drawn and have ultrasounds done as well. They want to monitor the eggies to make sure they are growing at a good rate. They will tell me when the eggies are at their stopping point and the night before operation egg removal, I give myself a different shot, go in the next day and they give me IV sedation and remove the eggs! Egg man says that he hopes to get at least 12 eggs, if not more!! YIPEE! Then, they freeze the eggs three to a pack. lol This is silly, but I told mom that I wished I could see my eggs and tell them to have a safe freeze, be good little eggies and that I loved them!! :) I'm BEYOND thrilled that I'm getting the opportunity to do this!! I think God just really needed me to trust Him the first go round of this and my reward for trusting Him was getting the opportunity to actually be able to go through with this!!! I couldn't be happier!!!! :)
Tuesday was PET scan day... I was pretty nervous that day because I knew that this was the more detailed scan to show if the c word was anywhere else in my body! I was injected and had to wait about 45 minutes before the test actually began. It was nice to just sit alone, catch up on paperwork and just pray by myself. I felt really good after having that alone time, just such a peace!! The test itself lasted about 28 minutes or so. I had to hold my hands above my head while laying down. FIRE FIRE FIRE!!!! Try holding your arms close to your ears for 16 minutes! I'm a patient person, but after my head and chest came out of that scan, I politely (and by polite I mean in a begging voice) asked the tech if I could move my arms because both of them were asleep and they were pretty much on FIRE! She laughed and said yes, but don't move anything else. Once those arms were moved, we were in business!!! After I left that scan, I had to go to the dentist. Apparently it's routine procedure before you start chemo, just to make sure that there are no cavities. Clean as a whistle!!! Dentist said I needed to come back and have a tooth fixed though because apparently I've been grinding my teeth at night (imagine that?!?!?!) and I had chipped a tooth. I'm guessing stress will do that to ya? lol
Wednesday I went back to the egg doctor so they could show me how to mix my medicine and give myself my shots. Maybe my nurse friends will want to come over and administer these for me??? haha There are like ten different steps you have to take in order to mix this medicine properly. I took good notes though, so all should be well!! And if you're wondering, yes, you do take hormone shots, but the egg doctor has talked with the oncologist and all is ok and will not harm lumpie in the process.
Thursday I met with the plastic surgeon, who seems to be extremely nice. (I'm thinking I'd really better like him a lot!!!) We went over the procedure of the first surgery, which is basically gonna be very painful. The general surgeon will go in first and take out the boobies, then the plastics guy will go in and place something called tissue expanders in underneath the muscle. I've heard it hurts really bad, but the dr said his goal was to keep me drugged up for three weeks!! :) He said I will come home with two brady drains in each boobie, but that they should only last 10-14 days. I've read that I can't take a bath during those days and that's gonna be ewwwhhhhhh gross!! I'm going to buy the bath towel things ASAP!!!!! Can't be running around smelling like surgery!! lol He said that the tissue expanders will basically grow my boobies for me. He said that when I get them to the size I like, then he will proceed from there. This will be a long process from what I understand. He will not do the reconstruction until I am finished with the chemo! Said it was more dangerous to have surgery while in mid chemo, which is fine with me. I'd much rather be safe than sorry!!! He said my boobies will start off small and then each week or so he would add fluid to them to make them grow. Ch-Ch-Ch-Chia!!! haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa I told mom I wasn't sure how I was going to feel having small boobies. Her reply, well get used to it sister because now you'll know how the rest of us with small ones feel! And I hope you get a good feel and have a great compassion for those of us who don't have boobies!!! lol FINE MOM!!!!! :) Thursday afternoon, I got a call from the surgeon. He said, "Dana, I know you have an appointment this afternoon, but I just wanted to call you and give you the results of your PET scan". My heart sank and I got really nervous really quick! Like I took a seat in the chair I was standing next to and I closed my eyes really tight! Well, ok, tell me what they are. He said, "you're negative for the PET scan too!!!". So, Lucille (surgeon likes to call me Lucille, which I think is absolutely adorable!!) will NOT be playing the part of the lit up Christmas tree in this years family holiday play! YAHOO!!!!!!!!!!! As soon as I hung up that phone, I texted my sister and called my momma!!! I hadn't been that excited or giggled that much since all this started!!! I was sooooooooooo HAPPY!!!!!! I asked my mom if she was proud of me for being such a good girl. She laughed and said she was VERY proud of me!! It was really sweet, I could hear the relief in her voice over the phone. I think they were really worried about this test!! I was too, but not like my mom was. So, I can breathe a little easier now!! I honestly feel like I've been handed the best of the best in this situation. Everything is negative and lumpie has stayed contained and not spread anywhere. (Surgeon will still have to do a sentinel node biopsy in the OR, but he said he feels like that may be negative as well.) I just couldn't be more blessed. Does the c word suck? YOU BET!!! Am I going to struggle? YOU BET!! Am I going to have good days and bad? YOU BET!!! With all that said, I just feel like it could be so much worse though. Had all my scans come back positive, I don't know what I would have done. I know I would have just dealt with it in the same manner I am now, but I feel like it would have been so much more emotional. Having the c word is harsh enough, but somehow, knowing it hasn't spread is so relieving! I know, without ANY doubts at all, it's the prayer that's gotten me this far. So, let me stop and say thank you... thank you for taking the time out of your day to think about me and say prayers for me. Thank you for being diligent and saying prayers for me on a daily basis. Thank you for taking the time to stop and read this blog so you know exactly what to pray for. Thank you for taking time out of your day to comment on my facebook when I have fantastic news. Thank you for caring enough to share my story with people I don't even know so that they can pray for me too. Thank you for continuing to follow this story. So many people say, "oh yes, I'll pray for you and I'll help in any way I possibly can", but then end up letting it go after some time has passed. You have ALL continued to let me know that you're not stopping the prayers and you're not stopping the encouragement and the cards and the messages and THAT is what's getting me through this!!! Each time I get good news, I take the time to stop and thank God for everyone that's praying for me. If it weren't for all of you, I would struggle SO much more than I am. Like I said earlier, I have such a peace about this and it's only because of all of the prayers, love and support that I'm getting!!!
Ok, Thursday afternoon, I met with the general surgeon to get some surgery dates together and get my official orders for admitting. I will have to be there a few hours prior to that to get injected with the radioactive material for the sentinel node biopsy. I signed all of my "what if's" for during the surgery. I found out that the surgery will pretty much be a 5 hour surgery, apparently I'm going to be doing some SERIOUS bonding with these two doctors!!
Supre fun this week... My co workers birthdays were this week. For everyone's birthday's we always get a cake and ice cream and cards and a present and such. One of my co workers and I were planning this party together... we went shopping for presents, decided on a cake, etc. Well, on Thursday, I found out that not only were we celebrating their birthday's, but it was an early birthday for me too! :) It made me soooo happy and it was soooo fun!! I got some new super fly button up jammies, that don't look like they're from the 1800s and this really cool pillow set for when I come home from the hospital! It's one of those pillows like we had in the 80s, the kind with the fluffy back and the arms that come around the sides. This will be perfect for after surgery!! I also got a matching pillow for under my legs. And my goodness, these pillows are SO super soft!! I also got a bed tray so that I can eat and such and not really have to move too much! I am so very thankful to work with such considerate and thoughtful peeps! I'm really not sure what I would do without these girls! They love me at my happiest and at my worst and for that, I couldn't be more greatful! They have seen me jump up and down and do the spazzy girl dance when I get good news and they have seen me squal and ball when I'm at my worst and can't push any more. They will never know how much they mean to me!! :)
This week, coming up, should be kinda low key for us! I plan on hanging out with my friends as much as possible and just taking it easy! It's so nice to just be able to laugh and have a good time during all of this, so friends, thank you for making me GO!!! :)
I hope you all have a wonderful week!! :)
